The last thing people think about when they think about Christmas is being beaten by an angry mother for picking up the last Battleship game from the toy aisle at Target.

Thirty minutes. That's all the time that I thought it was going to take me to get everything on my list. I remember on the drive to Target feeling really clever for going the day after Thanksgiving, since they were opening so early.

Sure, I thought there would only be a few other Christmas shoppers there.

The first thought that entered my head was that there must be a lot of clever people in St. Joe seeing that the entire population of Michigan appeared to be packed within the narrow aisles.

I did my best to stay calm, knowing that I was only there to pick up a few items; it shouldn't take that long. I fought my way the best that I could against the endless wave of humanity to make it to the toy section.

I was trying to buy Battleship, since it was on sale for that day only. There was only one left. I had picked it up and was making my way to the check out when I heard someone shouting behind me, "You little...I wanted that for my kid!" I turned just in time to see a gigantic purse come flying toward my face. I quickly fell to the ground just as the purse flew over my head, barely missing me.

As I struggled back to my feet, I felt a sharp pain in my side. The woman was stepping on me with one foot and trying her best to rip the Battleship game out of my hands. I tried to hold on, but in the end it was ripped from my hands. I quickly jumped to my feet ready to hunt her down, only to just catch a glimpse of her melting back in the crowd.

Dazed and injured, I decided to just get one thing and then get out of the nightmarish store. I limped my way over to buy a crock pot for my mom. I saw that they still had plenty left, and I could take my time getting there when all of a sudden I heard a low rumbling noise.

It seemed to be coming from everywhere all at once. A terrible fear gripped my heart as I turned around to see a mob of women sprinting toward me. It was too late to jump out of their path, and the first wave of people crashed into me. I felt my legs give out as the mob started to trample my back. My last glimpse of the pots was the mob taking all of them and leaving just as quickly as they had come.

Unable to stand, I started to crawl to the parking lot, hoping to escape the mad rush of shoppers. What seemed to be hours later I was finally in my car pulling away from the store that would haunt my dreams. I left with no gifts bought, and what felt like internal bleeding. On the long ride home, I made a vow to myself; from that day forth I would do all my shopping online.